comedians you should know

Ralph Barbosa’s Ass Won’t Last

Photo-Illustration: Alicia Tatone; Photos courtesy the subjects.

This week, we’re highlighting 25 talented writers and performers for Vulture’s annual list “The Comedians You Should and Will Know.” Our goal is to introduce a wider audience to the talent that has the comedy community and industry buzzing. (You can read more about our methodology at the link above.) We asked the comedians on the list to answer a series of questions about their work, performing, goals for the future, and more. Next up is Ralph Barbosa.

Tell us a story from your childhood you think explains why you ended up becoming a comedian.
In my senior-year English class, I realized if I made my teacher and classmates laugh, it would distract my teacher and keep him from getting work done. I didn’t want to do actual work, but I ended up staying up late every night writing bits to say in class the next day. I hated doing schoolwork so much I ended up working harder to get out of it.

What unscripted or reality series do you think you’d excel at? What archetype do you think you’d be?
I’d be perfect on The Real Housewives. I’d love to be the busboy in the background of a restaurant that the Housewives are arguing at.

What’s your proudest achievement of your comedy career so far?
Getting to meet Adam Sandler.

What have you learned about your own joke-writing process that you didn’t know when you started?
I’m funnier when I’m not trying.

Tell us everything about your worst show ever. (This can involve venue, audience, other comedians on the lineup — anything!)
My second show I ever booked was at the nastiest, raunchiest strip club in Euless, Texas. Strippers were mad that the comics were using the main stage. It was the moneymaking stage, but I made no money that night. The wireless mic kept cutting off, and most guys were facing the other way getting dances. One stripper named Bubbles screamed, “Keep going!” Shout-out to Bubbles.

Let’s say we live in a “Kings of Catchphrase Comedy” alternate dimension where every single comedian is required to have a hit catchphrase. What’s yours and why?
“This ass don’t last.” ’Cause if you really think about it, no ass will really last. Unless it’s an immortal ass.

Nominate one comedian you don’t know personally you think is overdue for wider recognition and why you’re a fan of their work.
Michael Rowland. I don’t know him personally but saw him on The Tonight Show, and once at a club in New York, and he was so funny. I can’t believe he’s not super-famous right now.

When it comes to your comedy opinions — about material, performing, audience, trends you want to kill/revive, the industry, etc. — what hill will you die on?
If you offend people often, you shouldn’t get canceled, but you should get your ass kicked from time to time.

If you had to come onstage to just one song for the rest of your life, what song would it be and why?
“Pick Up the Pieces” by Average White Band. It’s a feel-good song.

What is the best comedy advice, and then the worst comedy advice, you’ve ever received, either when you were starting out or more recently?
Best advice I ever received was “Be funny.” Worst advice I ever got was I should “network” more.

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Ralph Barbosa’s Ass Won’t Last